The book Raising Great Kids on Your Own provides guidelines for single mom and dads on how to raise kids. The authors not only teach single moms and dads how to treat children, they also share with the readers about how to adjust parents’ own mood and instructing them to continue their life after divorce.
Not claiming many feminism terms, the book provide some example and opinion which can be related to feminism as the following.
First, one standpoint that can be related to the book is From Hook’s article. According to Hook, “Feminism is the struggle to end sexist oppression. Its aim is not to benefit solely any specific group of women, any particular race or class of women. It does not privilege woman over men. It has the power to transform in a meaningful way all our lives. Most importantly, feminism is neither a lifestyle nor a ready-made identity or role one can step into.”(p29). Either single mom or dad can be a good parent according to the authors. In the book, the guidelines are provided in a neutral way such as “Express your love to your kids generously and frequently”, “Try to keep a clear, informed picture of how each of your children is adjusting to the challenging new reality of living in a one-parent home”. These words show that raising kids is difficult to both single mom and dad.
Usually, people consider that single moms experience a more difficult time than single dads do thus they should be much stronger. Actually, most single parenting books pay attention to single moms such as The Successful Single Mom. The Complete Single Mother, etc. Thus, this book is consistent with Hook’s idea of feminism, which is more gender equality.
Furthermore, although the target audience of the book are single moms and dads and tries its best to focus on both mom and dad, the stories in it are almost about single moms and state the difficulty of women who just got divorced.
For example, “Alone with two children under age five, Carla didn’t have the income to rent even a small apartment in her expensive Southern California locale. “
“Not yet 30, Bryanna didn’t feel young. She felt old, incompetent, and totally incapable of raising her two young children. She had no idea where to begin looking for work. If she did find work, who would watch the kids?”
“There is a fairly typical progression that occurs in many persons, most particularly among women, in the aftermath of a divorce. It begins with this realization: ‘I am a person who has experienced a failed marriage.’ They may identify their own family experience as being part of a ‘train wreck’ because their single mother or father believes this and behaves as if it is true.”
The above content in the book can be directly related to Hook’s idea of “family” (p37). According to Hook, “most people witness and /or experience the practice of sexist domination in family settings.” He points out that “the traditional western family, with its authoritarian male rule an its authoritarian adult rule, is the major training ground which initially conditions us to accept group oppression as the natural order”.
Hook considers family male-dominated. It is kind of true because most women in the book used to depend on husband to raise their children and once divorced, they experience a much harder time than divorced man because they have no ability to earn money yet they have to. The book also mentions several stories of single dad. However, these stories focus more on how single dads feel not good and hard to adjust their mood. Actually, they didn’t experience physical hardness as single moms.
Chenny, Your blog posting shows that you have certainly read a great portion, if not the entire, book that you are analyzing. It looks like both of our book selections may be similar in that they do not “claim many feminist terms” per say.
You make a great connection between the book and the hooks article. I didn’t see any links between the book though and the other article by Krolokki & Sorensen. You mention in your post that people consider that single moms experience more difficult time than single dads do. I find this theory quite interesting and wonder why that is. Is it the financial aspect (that you do mention) or more of an emotional issue? Perhaps it is the struggle to balance the life of a single parent that really affects woman?
You also mention that the book can be considered gender equality as it discusses both single mother and fathers. I did notice, however that the majority of the examples from the book are almost all about single moms and the difficulties they face after divorcing. I would be interested to learn if this books targets only those single parents who are raising their children on their own due to divorce or if there are examples of single parents who were never actually married as well.
I am fortunate enough to have both of my parents who have been married for over 30 years. I can only imagine the difficulties that both single mothers and fathers endure raising their children on their own. Great job pulling out specific quotes as well, the examples provide a greater understanding as to why this book relates to feminism.
The financial struggle that single mothers face can definitely be related to hooks; esp. her point on why many women rather seek comfort in a male-provided household. The point about equality may be better fit in The Second Wave as mentioned in Krolokke and Sorensen. hooks talks much more than equality, but ending oppression.