Sh*t happens. Figuratively and sometimes literally (if you have ever experimented with ingesting a running gel you know what I mean). Sometimes things don’t go as planned or don’t go the way you wanted them to. Maybe what you had envisioned was not what occurred.
Expect that mistakes and setbacks will happen. It is part of your transformation. It is ok to be disappointed (or disgusted) but then move on. Your journey will most likely not be a neat, straight path without any bumps in the road. Great success stories are never boring. There are often ups and downs and failures before successes. They don’t usually progress with everything going right along in an uneventful way. So, it is ok to have a winding path to your finish line. Lots of things may go wrong on your journey. In running you may not hydrate enough. You may run too fast at the outset, fail to pace yourself, and run out of steam. Or you may have digestive issues–I’ve learned the hard way from that mistake.
The legal profession has a culture of perfectionism but rather than fear making a mistake, focus on how learning from that mistake helped you develop grit and persevere. In law school you may stumble out of the gate and not do well on your first midterm exams or paper. You may have a deer in the headlights moment when called on in class by your professor. Maybe you talk way too fast during your oral argument. It is not whether you make a mistake, it is how you react to it. Use mistakes as a learning opportunity, get feedback on what you did right and wrong, and incorporate it for the next time.
You may fall down but pick yourself back up and keep going. A friend of mine who was also training for the same marathon I was running, literally fell down during her last long run before the race. She got back up and continued. She was running 20 miles and was having the best run of her training but then fell at mile 17. With a scraped up face and chest, and a possible sprained finger, she sat on the curb for a few minutes. She then collected herself, picked herself up, and ran the last 3 miles. She said she wouldn’t let herself cry until after she crossed the finish line at the marathon. Wow, now she has grit!
I’ve had students go from a below average grade on their first writing assignment and end up winning the best brief award at the end of the year. One grade, one exam, one paper, one class, etc., does not define your success in the future. When you do something for the first time don’t expect perfection. One of the reasons I love teaching is because I love learning. I love watching the growth of my students as they learn from mistakes. I also learn from my students and colleagues. I am also reminded on a daily basis how much I have yet to learn.
Frame mistakes and setbacks in a positive way. Looking at a setback in a positive light can change your mindset for the future. When I would stress out after having a bad run, a friend of mine would advise me that it was a good thing I had the bad run because now I had that behind me and I wouldn’t have a bad run on race day.
Sometimes you just have to endure. For example, runners often “hit the wall” around mile 20 in a marathon. It may be because it is the longest run you have done in your training so pushing beyond that is foreign and unknown territory. Similarly, in law school when writing a paper, preparing for class, outlining, or studying for exams, you may hit the wall. Much of what you are asked to do in law school may be something you have never done before for that particular audience or purpose. Own the struggle. “Embrace the suck.” Persist. Keep going! Sometimes just knowing that it is normal to hit the wall helps. Then, if you do hit it, it won’t throw you for a loop. Instead, you will keep moving forward.