5 Things to Do During Quarantine

Dec 1, 2021

By Driena Muca

About the author: Driena Muca is a freshman (Class of 2025) General Biology major. She’s an Albanian-American who has lived in New Delhi, India for the past six years. Some of her interests include art, soccer, music, and video games. She is currently writing and doing some graphic design work for The Voice.

Did you just contract Covid-19 during a global pandemic? Are you being forced to quarantine by yourself? Well, as a recent victim of this infamous virus, I have curated the perfect list of things to do to occupy your time. This list is so thorough, in fact, you’ll forget that you’re even in quarantine :). 

  • Wallow in self-pity 

We’re starting the list off strong with one of my favorite pastimes. Remember the time you did that one painfully embarrassing thing during high school? Now you can relive it in excruciating detail—and with no distractions because you’re in quarantine! Quarantine is the perfect time to overthink all your self-perceived flaws until you feel absolutely miserable. While the virus deteriorates your lungs, wallowing in self-pity will deteriorate your soul.

  • Convince a finance-bro that cryptocurrencies are like Fortnite V-Bucks

I’m going to be honest here, I don’t have the slightest idea how crypto or the stock market works. I watched The Big Short once and convinced myself that I was an expert. Nonetheless, what better time is there to get into arguments with completely random strangers on the internet than during quarantine. The difference between you and them is that your isolation from the outside world is involuntary!

  • Overtake a small Balkan country (I’m looking at you Albania) 

Sounds more complicated than it actually is. All you need is a little bit of money and a lot of propaganda. I can help as a translator if you choose to partake in this cute DIY quarantine activity. 

  • Start believing in horoscopes

Uhm yeah that Aries moon Virgo star asteroid whatever! Now you have the time to start believing in rocks and cards with arbitrary meanings and have it be socially acceptable. Why not blame your poor life decisions on the universe rather than yourself? You know what, queen? I’m with whatever entails deflecting self-responsibility. Now when Interpol arrests you for your invasion of Albania you can blame it on being a quirky Scorpio. 

  • Start a religion 

Actually, instead of believing in something that already exists (like horoscopes), you can just come up with something completely new that doesn’t make any sense. It’s not like you have anything better to do. Start praying to your new god and devote your entire life to them. My new religion involves praying to Nick Kroll, but specifically only when he voices Maury in the Netflix show Big Mouth.